Category: Uncategorized

Whatever Works is my new favorite movie. This is a big deal.  Previous favorite movies: Star Wars, Raising Arizona, and then The Matrix. I thought I would hang on to The Matrix forever, and I’m sure some people who know me personally will be happy to read that I’ve let it slip to the #2…

Apparently I’ve been ignoring the idea “The Universe is Between Your Ears,” which to me means that we create our own reality, literally. Although I’ve written before that I refuse to remove past posts, I did delete two recent articles.  While I don’t feel guilty for having those feelings nor for writing them down, I…

Screenshot of Westburo Baptist Church’s Websitehttp://www.GodHatesFags.com I’m not really sure I should bother writing about this because I might be helping Pastor Fred Phelps of Westboro Baptist Church in Topeka, KS spread his message. On second thought, the more his message is spread the more damage he does to his own cause, so let’s light…

We’ll start with a funny Mark Barbee moment. We were playing pinball in a biker bar in Tulsa.  Some guy was waiting.  When the game was over, Mark put another quarter in the machine.  The guy voiced his discontent.  Mark voiced his lack of concern in a humorous way. The guy opened his jacket to…

Today I attended a Mexican-American wedding at the local Catholic church in Shawnee.  The ceremony was in Spanish, but what I gathered is that the couple was married, as witnessed by the congregation, and sanctified by God. There was some standing up, there was some group-talk in Spanish, and there was some sitting down. El…

I’ve recently shied away from writing anything new that would reveal more of the controversial things I’ve done in my life, but these things I have experienced taught me a few things about the nature of reality and perhaps the reality of nature that might be of use to you. This post is about sight. When you…

I’ve been watching a movie about a guy who’s busy, but lonely.  He gets to spend a few weeks with his daughter. Not a day goes by that I don’t miss you and your brother.  I think about you often. Sometimes I feel bad that I’m not writing more for you here than I do,…

This article on the CNN website, “‘Enter birthdate’ not the Fort Knox of online child locks,” has a lot of unnecessary words which boil down to this: The method of keeping kids out of adult information sources on the Internet is baloney.  What’s your birthday? Do you agree to these terms? The online age thing is…

The Original Roofer on Fire is a great blog with many more readers than this one THAT MENTIONED ME!!!  OMG. Joe’s Version Here’s the posting. Of course, I had to notice that the fire on the right margin on the blog page looks like a woman’s body. You should check out her blog. Oh, this…

And now people have tried to get the police involved.  Thanks.  I suppose you can now feel as though you’ve tried to do something to “help” me.  That’s good. You’ll notice that I’m not in the mental slammer. I was able to buy a cigarette for $0.50.  That was good. I spent my last $0.27…

I drove across the country to see your mother in 1992. She said she liked this band called The Posies, so I bought an album and packed it along with 100 or so other CDs of mine for the trip. The only thing that varies between McDonalds in this land is the price of Coca…

The idea the Jesus is the only way is a dangerous one. Jesus is an almost perfect representation of God, except for the fact that the people who brought you Jesus tried to make it an exclusive club.  Ok, that might not make sense.  You’re thinking: Joe, it’s not exclusive… anyone who accepts Jesus can…

I miss you so much, it hurts.  I don’t want to miss you anymore, but I can’t see you. I really don’t understand why verbal messages aren’t passed back and forth… why I don’t hear any news about you. I’m thinking it’s because I’ve been effectively eliminated from your lives and minds in order to…

Kids, I love you. You need to know that in my early twenties my appendix was surgically removed. Just before they removed my appendix, a doctor poked it with his index finger, causing me to experience a sharp, searing pain.  The pain was so sudden and so strong that, for just a moment, I was…

Babies, I feel hopelessness most of the time.  I am so far under, I am usually sure I’ll never make it back to the surface.  Any period of time I don’t feel this way is due to distraction. I don’t blame the world, or circumstances, or luck, or the devil, I blame myself.  Things are…

Kids, Many people will love you, but none of them can give you love. The love you feel, you made. You can choose to love whatever, so choose to love everything. I want to quit writing things to entertain myself, or teach myself, or show someone I did something, or was something, or want to…

Plop down two little American brothers to crunch up some things with rocks and this interchange would probably be the same.  We’re all the same, but others convince us we’re of different worth. It makes sense to help your neighbor.  I agree, your neighbor usually lives right next to you. In America, even the poorest…

Nelson Mandela spent the first 18 of his 27 years in prison in thiscell on Robben Island where mainly political prisoners were forcedto spend their days breaking rocks in the hot sun. On the day of his release, Mandela called for peace andreconciliation with the white minority of South Africa. Out of the night that…

I’m convinced that the purpose of dreaming is to audition things that might be approved for reality in the “real world.”  Of course, 99.999% of what happens in dreams will never see the “light of day” in this “universe.” I think it’s also a lesson to us, teaching what would happen if we were turned…

Love is an imprecise word.  We use it all the time to different degrees and so, it has been said, the word is useless. Some would say that the vague nature of the word Love is what makes it so useful. “Oh, I love you,” said a certain way can be easy for one person…

Okay, here’s my weird story. Many years ago, I was driving back from Missouri with a group of friends.  It was late at night and we had had a long day.  My friends were sleeping. My thoughts were suddenly interrupted by a bright light on the side of the road, at the height of a…

Heck, just visit this page and check out how Twitter talks about jobs at Twitter. Click here.  I dare you.  (new window) Ok, I’m not going to try to get a job anywhere.  It seems weird and twisted and probably truly screwed up (if you’re related to me) and my excuse for all this nonsense…

I’m still telling your jokes. In the past couple of years, I’ve started saying Riboflavin is my favorite word. You’re the closest thing to a Muppet humanity has ever grown. That’s a compliment, I think. You can’t give something you don’t have and you can’t have something you don’t give.  I’m really, really trapped by…

Since no one but my babies is supposed to read this, then you must be one of my babies.  Thank God, you finally found this blog. Which baby are you? Little Man, you were only four when I saw you last.  You were nine when I wrote this. Baby J, you had just turned nine.…

Seek God? I’m glad you think God cares — I hope that works for you.  It makes no sense at all that God takes an interest in any individual life as one experience is as good as another and there are billions of people here to take my place, anyway. I can’t sing a song…

This Sailor is Navy Petty Officer, PO2 (Petty Officer, Second Class) EOD2 (Explosive Ordnance Disposal, Second Class), MIKE MONSOOR April 5th, 1981 ~ September 29th, 2009  Mike Monsoor was awarded “The Congressional Medal Of Honor” in April, 2008, for giving his life in Iraq in 2006, when he jumped on, and covered with his body, a live hand grenade, saving…

Back when I was a kid, one million dollars was a lot of money. I saw an interview with Jim Carrey a while back where he said when he was just starting out in show business that he wrote himself a one million dollar check and pledged that one day it would be good. When…

Did you read Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy? Did you read all of Vonnegut’s stuff? I’ve actually read more fiction than these guys but I always come back to them. Little Man, your sister and I read the Narnia books and the Wizard of Oz books and the lots of other books.  You should make some…

The most popular post on this blog right now is I’m Done Whining [August 24, 2010] – by far. The reason? If you search for “raining” on Google Images, it’s the seventh displayed out of more than 4 million results. If you click on Similar or More Sizes in the Google Images search results, you’ll…

Is John Lennon chewing gum?? I’ve thought about this song quite a bit recently. It’s a nice thought that love is all you need. What does he mean that you can’t sing a song that can’t be sung? Nothing you can see that isn’t shown? Nowhere you can be that isn’t where you were mean…

My partner had some business to attend to in a distant land, so I was left alone in the hideout with a three cigarette ration. I’m not good with rationing. My general theory of consumption is to consume smaller stores of goodies FASTER in order to get a more intense, yet short, moment of enjoyment.…

This is what I call a “sales letter” website. I’ve seen dozens of these selling all sorts of things from dating advice to kitchen appliances. The very first one I found was selling information on how to sell things on the Internet by creating sites like these.  Of course, the guy could hook you up…

I’m convinced that some movies are made badly on purpose, like Ice Twisters. Here’s the IMDB page. I’m a computer programmer, by all measures a failure at that, and yet I know I could have saved this screenplay by just editing down the nonsense. Imagine that weird ice twisters are breaking out in a three…

You know, it used to be that your stuff was basically secure because the number of people who understood the underlying systems and knew how to write software well enough to truly be “hackers” was pretty small. Today, I think that number is still relatively small, but the Internet can be used to distribute their…

The .co domain is a really silly idea, except if you make money on domain registrations. Here’s the idea: You can now get a name you’ve always wanted but couldn’t get because it was gone from the .com top-level domain. Why do you need a particular domain name?  For advertising, I assume.  I’m guessing you…

What I said about my mother beating and terrorizing me when I was little was true, but that wasn’t my mother. No, she wasn’t possessed. People change. She changed. She was never very warm to me.  In fact, the first time I can remember her hugging me since I was a teen ager was after…

Most of the images I use on this blog are stolen from other sites on the Internet and used without permission. When I looked for an image for this posting, I used Google’s image search on these keywords: gambling slots. It’s funny that one of the images that came up was on an article titled,…

These are some funny AT&T pictures, Babies. See, this is an AT&T security guard. I’ve made fun of AT&T because they’re Southwestern Bell and Southwestern Bell was kind of mean to me, like they were to anyone trying to compete with them, when I tried to start a CLEC. They were mildly mean.  I think…

Surely there’s something I can do for my country as an agent for the government, representing the people of the United States, in some secret mission abroad, perhaps risking my life and/or my testicles, in order to advance the cause of freedom and/or the economic dominance of my Zionist masters. My resume: I speak English fluently…

Kids in the Hall did this on television… from Canada I think.Somehow Canadians appear on television in the United Statesfrom time to time thanks to the magic of theCanadian Electromagnetic Comedy Dissemination SystemI don’t actually recognize this guy.I did see Kids in the Hall perform a stage show in Houstonsome years ago.  It was one of…

In this New Scientist article a program in Japan testing a little kids monitoring device hooks up kids so that their parents can see what their children are seeing. “The technology builds on existing devices that can track the location of a child, but this gadget also monitors what the child is seeing, and even their…

Trish died earlier this year.  One of her family members wrote this tribute to her. Rest in peace, Mrs.!!!  You really always did have a positive attitude going.  My mom did, too. Trish was a avid reader. She liked all kinds of books, and loved poetry. One of her favorite poems was How Did You…

You saw the number thing as being reduced to a number… it was actually a compliment.  Perhaps you have had dozens and dozens of relationships, but I’ve had 4. Look at all that has happened recently.  Having me around was just making everything worse for you as I was distracting you from the things you…

This is just like 2008 when I knew I was going to be homeless with the exception that at that time I had never been homeless and didn’t know just how much it was going to suck. Oh sure, there was some fear of the unknown, but when you’re talking about the unknown you can…

At 9:11 this morning, I’ll be 42 years old. I was born at a hospital called Research, so I’m obviously part of an experiment. I wonder if I’m in the control group or the freak. Two weeks after I threw all my Abilify pills in the toilet in 2007, I experienced schizophrenia symptoms.  Sometimes doctors…

If you’re a pitcher who can throw a 90mph fastball and you find yourself in space standing on top of a ship travelling 100mph and you throw a fastball ahead of the ship… then that ball would be leaving you at 90mph relative to you, but someone watching from a distance would see the ball…

The domain name service for the blog has been switched back to blogspot.com, so the search feature might not work for some time, while Google catches up to the change. This is the last posting that will be announced to Facebook and Twitter.  I’m removing the Networked Blogs thing in Facebook that has been handling…

I’m not cut out for this. Oct 24, 10: I figured out that suicide for me is about control.  There’s very little that I feel I can control.  I’m not in control of my feelings, my actions, my mission, my needs, my wants, or my will.  Most people exert no control over when they die…

When your new friend is being attacked by a racially and sexually diverse assassination squad, you’re going to need to know a few tricks to turn your scanning hobby into a survival skill. First: Always dress for scanning success.  Only your left glove is required, but you’re going to need a scarf and a matching…

I miss you. It’s getting harder and harder to cheer myself up, but this helps. I’m sorry if we don’t see each other again.

I very rarely dream about you, but this morning I dreamed about you for the second night in a row.  You were laughing at a joke I made about some stuffed animals.  I had forgotten how nice it was to hear you laugh. For when you’re lonely; For when you’re tired; For when you’re sick;…

John Cusack as Lane Meyer in Better Off Dead (1985) I graduated from high school in 1986.  If you don’t remember 1986 because you were young, unborn, or in a coma, then you could see Hot Tub Time Machine for an exaggerated version of the time complete with hair and clothing styles and jokes about…

This isn’t going to work out because I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place. (a) I can’t tell a potential employer that I would be an asset to their organization.  The reality is that my throughput is below average and will come at the cost of some pain in their ass. (b) I’m…

I saw Karate Kid.  It was great. Of course the movie has the messages you would expect: Prepare, don’t be scared; never give up; trust old men who know how to fight. The other message was all about the Chinese. Someone thinks you need to know about the Chinese.  There are good Chinese, there are…

Screen capture of animation at http://joedesktop.com joeDesktop is a software product and associated online service I’ve been planning for a while.  The desktop software will most likely be done for Adobe AIR. I have been planning on learning to use jQuery for a while now though so I decided to do something today on this…

I decided to stop trying to give up and I feel much better. I have to admit that the plan was to kill myself… ignoring temporarily that I have not been able to accomplish the task in the past due to some weird inner-need to survive.  The way I was going to accomplish this was…

I thought I would put this prophecy into text again. My careers will take off.  I will become very well known.  I will continue to say what I have to say about religion as a power structure and continue to advocate that people take matters into their own brains and think about God directly.  I…

This was ripped directly off his site at http://roger-waters.com where you can get information about his tour this fall of The Wall.From what I have heard, video technology has finally caught up with his vision. This promises to be a great time.Roger Waters: I recently came across this quote of mine from 22 years ago:…

Box from: Wikipedia about LEDs OLED technology is going to completely change our lives. LEDs are little lights.  The light is emitted because electrons try to jump across a semiconductor… they try because the semiconductor has holes for them.  When the electron gets there, a photon of light is released. Electrons are all about potential.  They’ll…

Deer will sometimes freeze when caught in headlights. Sometimes people will also freeze in fear. Sometimes people can get so depressed about what they think is coming, impending doom or whatnot, that they just freeze. Sometimes people hope for a quicker resolution, even bad, because the waiting isn’t much fun. Why doesn’t the deer run…

The problem with this blog is that I wrote it under my own name… people who know me read it. So, there’s no longer complete honesty here. I’ve definitely got that same feeling a school kid gets towards the end of summer, when all the back-to-school sales start. I sincerely don’t see me living a…

Now reading Conversations with God By Neale Donald Walsch. I’m going to see if he’s full of shit. ** I’m a few pages in and I’m a little tingly. This is what I’ve been experiencing.. thoughts and experiences… both in life and in simulation. I’m freaked.

Yvonne Strahovski as Sarah Walker Chuck is a television series appearing on NBC. You can see episodes here on NBC.com. Here are the reasons geeks watch Chuck. (1) Chuck is a geek.(2) Yvonne Strahovski has a license to kill.(3) Chuck becomes a spy.(4) Yvonne Strahovski carries two weapons at all times.(5) Chuck gets to hang out…

Apparently Motorola has my email address because they sent me an ad last night for this DROID2 phone which runs the Android 2.2 operating system. This is pretty funny because I can’t actually afford things like cell phones or internet service or food.  But, Motorola doesn’t know that. A man who can afford cell phones,…

This guy who’s a Muslim finds out he’s adopted.  He tracks down his birth records and it turns out he was born a Jew.  Then he finds out that his father is still alive, but he’s dying and the rabbi attending his father will not let him in the room because, he says, the old…

I’m currently far from Shawnee. I spent seven hours in a car this morning watching someone else sleep.  Actually, the time was broken up by moving from one place to another to avoid being noticed, much.  The passenger side window by me is missing thanks to a thief.  It did rain some… on me.  🙂…

Actually, no one makes me mad. If I get mad, it’s because I decided to get mad. My use of that headline is an instance of manipulation.  In fact, if someone says “You make me mad!” to you, then they’re also trying to manipulate you — to get you to take responsibility for how they…

John Lennon seemed so old in 1980 — the big 4 0.

Until you have absolutely no money, you cannot imagine the true value of having money. I don’t know when you’re reading this, but when you’re a kid you might understand the value of your money.  You don’t understand the value of your parents’ money. Baby J and Little Man, when your mom and I split…

You found my blog.  Excellent. I’m flattered you bothered to look me up. When you read what I’ve written here, you’ll come to the following conclusion: I am just the person you’ve been looking for, crazy enough to make that little technology problem/opportunity you have stand up and get in line. I believe in complete…

In math, an “empty set” is a set of numbers that contains no numbers.  It could be thought of as a place where you could put numbers, if you had some. I just deleted the story I was telling. Strangely, I wrote the title and the first paragraph, intending not to tell a story, but…

So I was in the middle of making a little statement about judgment when I realized I was out of cigarettes and had to make a trip to Mr. Kim’s little shop at the corner of Highland and Kickapoo in Shawnee, Oklahoma. Mr. Kim’s is a little convenience store complete with a multiply-headed fuel pumping…

I tried to return to work this morning and quit again, for the last time.  I appreciate the help I’ve received and the opportunity to continue, but I am unable to do any more computer work.  My brain doesn’t want to cooperate and I can’t breath.  I’d rather hide out here in my apartment pretending…

I enjoyed a nice little breakfast at the Salvation Army in Shawnee, Oklahoma then attended the morning announcements and the Sunday school lesson which was from Judges, a book in the Old Testament. I would give you a synopsis of the lesson, but you can look up Judges if you like.  There are plenty of…

As you might have noticed, numbers are very important to some crazy people.  Since people have noticed this ratio in nature and deemed it “Golden” then as an homage to my formerly crazy self, I’m going to remind you that I was born on June 18th at the center of the universe which is firmly…

I’m not going to write about what happened last week.  I deleted my website, blog, Twitter, Tumblr, and Facebook accounts last week so I would not have any place to post negative things.  That’s my excuse anyway. This blog, the website, and the Facebook accounts are back, but the Twitter and Tumblr are gone. I’m…

Always looking for early morning adventure, I decided to pack up my camera and head to the Firelake Casino between Shawnee and Tecumseh, Oklahoma at 5:30am this Sunday morning. It was a beautiful morning. I walked all around the place and took some cool pictures. Then I put my camera in my pocket and went…

Music by Elton JohnLyrics by Bernie TaupinAvailable on the album Honky Château She packed my bags last night pre-flightZero hour nine a.m.And I’m gonna be high as a kite by thenI miss the earth so much I miss my wifeIt’s lonely out in spaceOn such a timeless flight And I think it’s gonna be a…

Ask yourself: Is it possible for there to be nothing? Was there a time when there was absolutely nothing? Don’t limit the question to the known universe! Was there a time when there just was nothing?!?!? It’s difficult to consider because your brain knows it is impossible for something to come from nothing and there…

The Universe isn’t digital, really. Well, wait, you either are or you are not.  Yes or no.  Come or go. On or off. Digital means on or off.  To be digitized is to be turned into a stream of ons and offs. The Universe feels. The Universe feels the vibrations on strings of energy which…

Ok, I said there was nothing I wanted, but there are some things that I said I wanted in the past.  I guess I still want these: (1) My daughter and I dreamed about buying some land near a neighborhood in Tulsa that needed a park, building a park, and donating it to the city.…

I met Kim in my 7th grade English class at Union Junior High in Tulsa, Oklahoma. Ok, to be truthful, I don’t think I ever talked to her, but we were in the same class and I kept a close eye on her. I thought Kim was very cute and smart.  She won our class…

Blogger, I apologize for dissing your new-fangled editor.  I was hurt because when it messed up my old postings, it made me feel like I had been foolish to choose to use it, wasting my time, and tweaking that core hurt in my gut that tells me I’m a loser. Oh, Blogger, you’re not responsible…

People who act solely by what they think seem cold to me, but I have to admit they appear to be more successful in life than people who act solely on what they feel. Regardless of what people tell you, you are the only one who decides what you feel, so actually you are always…

Folks, I’m just being dramatic and expressing how I feel, but I am not going to kill myself.  It’s looking like I’m going to be homeless, but I’m not going to kill myself.  I don’t think I can be homeless in Shawnee, though.  And I’m not really excited about going to Tulsa — I’m not…

This morning I was looking for adventure, but first I needed to fill my tank. Happiness is a full tank. That’s a saying from Way of the Peaceful Warrior.  It’s a book my brother bought for me.  It’s sort of a metaphysical fantasy about being at peace with yourself and the universe. This college athlete,…

That there is a Mexican Breakfast made by the men at  Sunny Side Up in Shawnee, Oklahoma. Three men work behind the counter cooking things.  There’s Gary Do, Sean (Grasshopper), and Dude.  I don’t know Dude’s name yet. Two ladies work all over the place: Valerie and Destiny.  And there’s another guy who does things,…

When you’re staying at the Salvation Army Lodge in Shawnee, Oklahoma, you’re required to do a couple of things in order to retain your welcome: 1. Get up on time.2. Do your morning chore.3. Get out on time.4. Be back before 9:00pm for devotion.5. Take a shower. On Sunday, you go for a breakfast with…

After some reading of Exodus (it’s a book in the Old Testament of the Bible) it dawned on me that it read like political propaganda in support of Moses, as if Moses was trying to maintain his power as a dictator. You should know that I am a fan of Jesus and really dislike the…

I love this movie so much, I have stopped it 37 minutes in to post this blog. This Steve Zahn guy is awesome. Of course, I love Jennifer Aniston. But she’s a corporate art salesperson who wants to build the ultimate soup kitchen with a lodge and a recreation room and job assistance for homeless…

[THIS WAS FORWARDED TO ME BY MY AUNT, WENDY. I’M POSTING IT HERE SO I CAN FORWARD IT TO MY 1440 FOLLOWERS ON TWITTER.] Written By Regina Brett, 90 years old, of The Plain Dealer, Cleveland, Ohio To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me… It is the most-requested column…

My last post was missing an important element: Acknowledgement of the problems I caused you. I apologize for my behavior and I am sorry that I delayed realization of the home you wanted. I just told a little story about Trip to the Moon and remembered that you found a copy for me. That was…

Dear Grandma Link, Thank you for posing for this… kidding!!!  You’re much better looking and you certainly don’t need to make such a gesture to get your point across.  First of all, your points are always more positive, and second, a twinkle from your left and/or right eye seems to work wonders. When I started…

21 was a movie based on a book about the MIT Blackjack Club, a group of students who were trained by a professor to count cards at Blackjack tables. It’s a true story.  They made lots of money until they were caught. The movie has a scene in which Professor Kevin (shown to the left)…

My birthday is June 18.  I am a Gemini. Geminis are famous for having dual personalities.  I have at least two. My two most prominent personalities are complete opposites. Joe seems optimistic, but optimism implies surety that things will work out because things just seem to work out.  Joe isn’t optimistic, he knows the future and…

I signed up for Chinese lessons last week. I paid their registration fee of $85.  They’re sending me equipment to take the lessons on the Internet.  I’m guessing it’s a headset and camera. They’re also sending me a study kit. The tuition is $580 ($193.33/mo for three months of lessons). I get to take an…

Click here to find out what that bastard on the left is. In case you haven’t noticed, I have multiple personalities. When I decide what to do, I give speeches in my head and refer to myself as, “we.” “We need to do this.” “We’re going to do that.” “This is why we need to…

This guy to the left is one of my favorite people. He’s still out there, you know. One of my favorite activities is to decide what I would say to guys like this if they were suddenly transported to the future. This begs the question, did I come up with that idea or was it…

Tell me David Byrne’s not one of the best ever. Tell me. I dare you. This song was written with God, no doubt.  It could be called Ode to My Little Friends. Holy crap, when I listen to music I want to make it so badly I almost want to give up everything else.  But,…