Maybell the Spider

This is Maybell the Spider.

Maybell lives in the tree just off my front porch.  Every night, she spins a web in front of the porch light with high hopes of the eight-legged kind, of trapping a juicy moth.  Bad for the moth, but Maybell eats once more and the cycle goes on.

This is a picture of a spider’s victory lap.  She’s chowing down on her first catch of the night.

I know I’ve made statements that are disturbing to some of you.  Some of you are rightly concerned for my mental well being.

I assure you that one or both of the following is true: (a) That this is completely true, and/or (b) that this is the most effective PR hoax ever perpetrated on mankind.  There’s no way a single human being could pull off what you’ll witness this following year.  Heck, you and I together with 50 of our friends couldn’t accomplish what was recorded today alone.

Friends, my mental health was in jeopardy when I was denying the truth, starting in May of 2004.  It didn’t make any sense at all and everything in my human education told me that I was experiencing a drug-induced delusion.  When drugs didn’t seem to explain it (because the delusion did not end when the drug was over) then I turned to a kind psychiatrist who diagnosed me with Bipolar I disorder and I started taking medication.  The medication did not stop the delusion or the visions.  Their science did not stop my mood swings.

My mood swings were not actually caused by a disorder but by my own consciousness trying to deny what was starting to look like the truth.  There had to be a battle fought in my soul between the forces of human rational and those of gut instinct.

In the end, I gave over to gut instinct, but not because I had yet learned that giving in is the only sensible tack — it was because I starting noticing parallels between scenes of and whole movies where actors physically seemed to resemble me and their settings my life and their situations my dilemma.

I truly sounded like a crazy man when I told my Uncle Kevin that he must watch The Matrix very closely because it was made about me.

God had to provide physical evidence to my eyes to validate what I was feeling in my heart because my rational human experience would not allow me to accept the truth.

If you deny God, then you are living in a dream world, Neo.  Or, are you Cipher?  Be Trinity for me tonight.

I am not alone, and neither are you.  No truly awesome accomplishment of thought or might was ever the result of independent human action.  The pyramids were not built by men, but by a brain as large as the human race.  You are a finger in the body of God.  You are his eyes and ears, his boots on the ground.  You are his muscle and he is your soul.