Year: 2010

Being miserable is important, but it’s also important to not have friends. It’s not good enough to ignore friends, because some won’t take being ignored… I found it’s easier to get family to blow you off than some friends. So, the next step is to lose some friends.

Seek God? I’m glad you think God cares — I hope that works for you.  It makes no sense at all that God takes an interest in any individual life as one experience is as good as another and there are billions of people here to take my place, anyway. I can’t sing a song…

This isn’t going to work out because I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place. (a) I can’t tell a potential employer that I would be an asset to their organization.  The reality is that my throughput is below average and will come at the cost of some pain in their ass. (b) I’m…

I decided to stop trying to give up and I feel much better. I have to admit that the plan was to kill myself… ignoring temporarily that I have not been able to accomplish the task in the past due to some weird inner-need to survive.  The way I was going to accomplish this was…

The problem with this blog is that I wrote it under my own name… people who know me read it. So, there’s no longer complete honesty here. I’ve definitely got that same feeling a school kid gets towards the end of summer, when all the back-to-school sales start. I sincerely don’t see me living a…

My partner had some business to attend to in a distant land, so I was left alone in the hideout with a three cigarette ration. I’m not good with rationing. My general theory of consumption is to consume smaller stores of goodies FASTER in order to get a more intense, yet short, moment of enjoyment.…

I’m currently far from Shawnee. I spent seven hours in a car this morning watching someone else sleep.  Actually, the time was broken up by moving from one place to another to avoid being noticed, much.  The passenger side window by me is missing thanks to a thief.  It did rain some… on me.  🙂…

In math, an “empty set” is a set of numbers that contains no numbers.  It could be thought of as a place where you could put numbers, if you had some. I just deleted the story I was telling. Strangely, I wrote the title and the first paragraph, intending not to tell a story, but…

I tried to return to work this morning and quit again, for the last time.  I appreciate the help I’ve received and the opportunity to continue, but I am unable to do any more computer work.  My brain doesn’t want to cooperate and I can’t breath.  I’d rather hide out here in my apartment pretending…

I’m not going to write about what happened last week.  I deleted my website, blog, Twitter, Tumblr, and Facebook accounts last week so I would not have any place to post negative things.  That’s my excuse anyway. This blog, the website, and the Facebook accounts are back, but the Twitter and Tumblr are gone. I’m…

Ask yourself: Is it possible for there to be nothing? Was there a time when there was absolutely nothing? Don’t limit the question to the known universe! Was there a time when there just was nothing?!?!? It’s difficult to consider because your brain knows it is impossible for something to come from nothing and there…

I met Kim in my 7th grade English class at Union Junior High in Tulsa, Oklahoma. Ok, to be truthful, I don’t think I ever talked to her, but we were in the same class and I kept a close eye on her. I thought Kim was very cute and smart.  She won our class…

First, go to the Phoenix Asian Diner in Shawnee, Oklahoma. They’re open!! Find a seat. Decide what kind of sushi you want. If you’re extremely fortunate (and I always am) then Vivian will bring you the kind of sushi you ordered! I love Steam Rice!! You put soy sauce into your little bowl. Then you…

That there is a Mexican Breakfast made by the men at  Sunny Side Up in Shawnee, Oklahoma. Three men work behind the counter cooking things.  There’s Gary Do, Sean (Grasshopper), and Dude.  I don’t know Dude’s name yet. Two ladies work all over the place: Valerie and Destiny.  And there’s another guy who does things,…

At 9:11 this morning, I’ll be 42 years old. I was born at a hospital called Research, so I’m obviously part of an experiment. I wonder if I’m in the control group or the freak. Two weeks after I threw all my Abilify pills in the toilet in 2007, I experienced schizophrenia symptoms.  Sometimes doctors…

21 was a movie based on a book about the MIT Blackjack Club, a group of students who were trained by a professor to count cards at Blackjack tables. It’s a true story.  They made lots of money until they were caught. The movie has a scene in which Professor Kevin (shown to the left)…

I signed up for Chinese lessons last week. I paid their registration fee of $85.  They’re sending me equipment to take the lessons on the Internet.  I’m guessing it’s a headset and camera. They’re also sending me a study kit. The tuition is $580 ($193.33/mo for three months of lessons). I get to take an…

I saw Karate Kid.  It was great. Of course the movie has the messages you would expect: Prepare, don’t be scared; never give up; trust old men who know how to fight. The other message was all about the Chinese. Someone thinks you need to know about the Chinese.  There are good Chinese, there are…

I thought I would put this prophecy into text again. My careers will take off.  I will become very well known.  I will continue to say what I have to say about religion as a power structure and continue to advocate that people take matters into their own brains and think about God directly.  I…

Tell me David Byrne’s not one of the best ever. Tell me. I dare you. This song was written with God, no doubt.  It could be called Ode to My Little Friends. Holy crap, when I listen to music I want to make it so badly I almost want to give up everything else.  But,…

Blessed is the man that walketh not in the counsel of the ungodly, nor standeth in the way of sinners, nor sitteth in the seat of the scornful. But his delight is in the law of the LORD; and in his law doth he meditate day and night. And he shall be like a tree…

Actually, no one makes me mad. If I get mad, it’s because I decided to get mad. My use of that headline is an instance of manipulation.  In fact, if someone says “You make me mad!” to you, then they’re also trying to manipulate you — to get you to take responsibility for how they…

So I was in the middle of making a little statement about judgment when I realized I was out of cigarettes and had to make a trip to Mr. Kim’s little shop at the corner of Highland and Kickapoo in Shawnee, Oklahoma. Mr. Kim’s is a little convenience store complete with a multiply-headed fuel pumping…

I enjoyed a nice little breakfast at the Salvation Army in Shawnee, Oklahoma then attended the morning announcements and the Sunday school lesson which was from Judges, a book in the Old Testament. I would give you a synopsis of the lesson, but you can look up Judges if you like.  There are plenty of…

Always looking for early morning adventure, I decided to pack up my camera and head to the Firelake Casino between Shawnee and Tecumseh, Oklahoma at 5:30am this Sunday morning. It was a beautiful morning. I walked all around the place and took some cool pictures. Then I put my camera in my pocket and went…

The Universe isn’t digital, really. Well, wait, you either are or you are not.  Yes or no.  Come or go. On or off. Digital means on or off.  To be digitized is to be turned into a stream of ons and offs. The Universe feels. The Universe feels the vibrations on strings of energy which…

Blogger, I apologize for dissing your new-fangled editor.  I was hurt because when it messed up my old postings, it made me feel like I had been foolish to choose to use it, wasting my time, and tweaking that core hurt in my gut that tells me I’m a loser. Oh, Blogger, you’re not responsible…

This morning I was looking for adventure, but first I needed to fill my tank. Happiness is a full tank. That’s a saying from Way of the Peaceful Warrior.  It’s a book my brother bought for me.  It’s sort of a metaphysical fantasy about being at peace with yourself and the universe. This college athlete,…

When you’re staying at the Salvation Army Lodge in Shawnee, Oklahoma, you’re required to do a couple of things in order to retain your welcome: 1. Get up on time.2. Do your morning chore.3. Get out on time.4. Be back before 9:00pm for devotion.5. Take a shower. On Sunday, you go for a breakfast with…

I love this movie so much, I have stopped it 37 minutes in to post this blog. This Steve Zahn guy is awesome. Of course, I love Jennifer Aniston. But she’s a corporate art salesperson who wants to build the ultimate soup kitchen with a lodge and a recreation room and job assistance for homeless…

Dear Grandma Link, Thank you for posing for this… kidding!!!  You’re much better looking and you certainly don’t need to make such a gesture to get your point across.  First of all, your points are always more positive, and second, a twinkle from your left and/or right eye seems to work wonders. When I started…

My birthday is June 18.  I am a Gemini. Geminis are famous for having dual personalities.  I have at least two. My two most prominent personalities are complete opposites. Joe seems optimistic, but optimism implies surety that things will work out because things just seem to work out.  Joe isn’t optimistic, he knows the future and…

Click here to find out what that bastard on the left is. In case you haven’t noticed, I have multiple personalities. When I decide what to do, I give speeches in my head and refer to myself as, “we.” “We need to do this.” “We’re going to do that.” “This is why we need to…

This guy to the left is one of my favorite people. He’s still out there, you know. One of my favorite activities is to decide what I would say to guys like this if they were suddenly transported to the future. This begs the question, did I come up with that idea or was it…

This was ripped directly off his site at http://roger-waters.com where you can get information about his tour this fall of The Wall.From what I have heard, video technology has finally caught up with his vision. This promises to be a great time.Roger Waters: I recently came across this quote of mine from 22 years ago:…

Now reading Conversations with God By Neale Donald Walsch. I’m going to see if he’s full of shit. ** I’m a few pages in and I’m a little tingly. This is what I’ve been experiencing.. thoughts and experiences… both in life and in simulation. I’m freaked.

You may have heard that I’m moving all my stuff to Amazon’s Web Services which is a cloud computing solution. AWS includes everything one would need for gigantic systems but it’s completely flexible on how resources are deployed and you only pay for what you use. So, it’s possible to start something small and let…